Life is Wonderful!

What a wonderful Christmas movie! I know these posts are a bit late but we can't skip Christmas! First off, this was my first Christmas away from home and my family. While watching the classic "It's a Wonderful Life" I swooned a bit over the striking Jimmy Stewart (he always reminds me of the one and only picture in Em and Rays first apt above the kitchen sink ??), sang along to "Buffalo gals won't you come out tonight, come out tonight, come out tonight. Buffalo gals..." and then came to thinking about the lesson learned in Mr. George Baily's life this particular Christmas. I thought about friends and family whom I wouldn't be seeing or hearing carols from or watching in the Smith Christmas Talent Show or delighting in eggsaronious with. I thought about all the cheesey movies, books, and devotionals we hear this time of year that feed us the message, "It's the people in our lives that matter most," and about the irreplaceable truth, though so cliche, in that message.


My dad is a really hard person to buy presents for. Of course, Harbor Freight or Chinese Gourmet gift cards are always appropriate, but getting something you know he'll really like is pretty tricky. With Mother, heck, wrap up a pair of socks and she'll light up, pour out praises of gratitude, and put them on right there in front of you. In thinking of presents for the 'rents I thought about all the presents they've gifted to us. I really feel love out of those presents. Lest I come off as spoiled and materialistic, let me illustrate: My father is very practical, especially when spending money. Why get an iPod when there are perfectly functioning MP3 players for half the price? Well, because they're cooler but that's never a real reason for parents, right? Anyway, Christmas comes around and there it is, shining in all of its glory...a new brand-name iPod. (Thank goodness for mother, huh? j/k Dad) Fast-forward a couple months and there in the mail are 2 lovely Valentine's cards for Natalli and I with nothing less than i-Tunes gift cards from Dad. Maybe you're wondering what the big deal is and I probably can't explain it. It has to do with selflessness, it has to do with forgetting practicality because your kids are in your thoughts instead, it has to do with love. I love my parents lots and lots, and really I can't help but love them because of all they have done. 1 John 4:19 "We love because He first loved us." I think that is what parents are meant to teach. The familial design is no accident/coincidence. I'm excited to pass on the message. (And no I'm not announcing anything.)

That's my Christmas tangent. Merry Christmas, all!

phonemes, fricatives, and diphthongs

"As you read this sentence, you are taking part in one of the wonders of the natural world."

-Steven Pinker

I LOVE my major!
I've never been so excited to read a text book and go to classes. It's amazing how much better school life is when you have finally found what you're passionate about studying...even if it means at least 4 more years of school. Anyway, that's what's new with me!

винни рух: My Russian Treasure

I found BiHHi Pyx (Vinni Puh) on YouTube! This is my favorite memory within the walls of my host family's house:



Would it be too confusing if I raised my kids on the Russian versions of popular cartoons?

A Change, A Poem, and Lot's Wife

In keeping with the popular theme bustling in the air of a new year, I thought it time to change my blog's title (never mind the fact that it used to be Моя Жизнь в Украине (My Life in Ukraine) and that it's been 7 months since I've actually held residence there.) ...but what to change it to?

It was a year ago today that I was in an airplane full of strangers headed to a foreign country as a teacher. Ukraine was so many things for me. I don't regret it in any way, and there are fruits gleaned from being there which I will treasure all my life. With these came a price, though, and it was one that left me in the darkest hole. At many times this year I felt that all the things that matter most to me had been heartlessly ripped away. Now through time's lens I can more easily say that this cost is just part of "A whole [God] planned/ Youth shows but half" (...though, a lesson learned doesn't take away from the reality of darkness.)

Elder Holland gave the weekly Tuesday devotional yesterday, and the theme was Luke 17:32, "Remember Lot's wife."

The struggle with depression is that it's a downward spiral. As events continued to be less than perfect for me, I was harder and harder on myself and slipped deeper and deeper. My body isn't perfect. It was hard to separate this from lies in my head, lies which lead to guilt and deeper sliding. Sometimes we need help, and it's okay. With a little bit healthier brain, my vision has been cast off of the "inevitable" downward. And in due nature of all circumstances that "just take time," I am ready to receive a new, additional source of help. With the wisdom from Elder Holland, my vision is now cast upward:

"Lot's wife had an attachment to the past that was stronger than her confidence in the future."

"Faith ALWAYS looks forward... Faith builds on the past but never longs to stay there."

"Bring with you the best of every experience."

See, when I felt like everything dear to me (success in school, healthy relationships, FEELING love, even Heavenly Father's love, sincerely caring for others) was consumed by the limitations of my imperfect body, I saw nothing but down. But I'm here (and the "how" I'll save for less public settings). I explain this much, though, because of the change in my blog, the source of which is my new favorite discovery (also thanks to Elder Holland's devotional): Grow Old Along with Me by Robert Browning. I love every aspect of this poem: the message, the rhyme scheme, the diction, the irony, the metaphors and other facets I don't know the technical terms for but admire all the same. It is the source of my new blog title because of how necessary it is to let go of any desire to go back and do this year over; I've learned too much to pull a "Lot's wife."

One line captures in six words a paramount truth I now own: "As the bird wings and sings." That is, I have both a body and a spirit, and together, only, can I reach my purpose here. There will be times that the physical will inhibit the spiritual, but I will not despise it for they work hand in hand. I have confidence in the future, "For thence,--a paradox/ Which comforts while it mocks,--/Shall life succeed in that it seems to fail."

This is a blog of my life, and as I wing, I sing... that's how I'm choosing to be!